On Fridays, I’m going to attempt to do a quick(ish) post that lists five things. This week, here are five lies I told my three year old.
1. I told my three year old that my lemonade was water because I didn’t want her to have any. Along those same lines, I drink chocolate milk several times a week and when she asks me what it is, I just tell her “it’s not for kids.” I was about to defend myself by saying I didn’t *exactly* lie because I could have told her it was something besides chocolate milk but the thing is chocolate milk pretty much IS FOR KIDS. So ya, I lied.
2. I told my three year old that Pinkberry was closed when it wasn’t.
3. I told my three year old that her sister was so happy to see her that she was screaming with excitement and that baby was trying to touch her hair because she thought her big sister’s hair was so pretty. I lied. Baby was screaming like a banshee because I wouldn’t let her yank it with all the might that a 17 pound one year old can muster. Pulling hair just doesn’t get old.
4. I told my three year old that I would only spray her hair with water one more time. But then I sprayed it like five times. I’m such a bitch (and she has unruly hair).
5. I told my three year old that I could only stay with her for a few minutes while tucking her in. She asked why I couldn’t stay with her until she fell asleep. I told her I needed to clean up the family room. After leaving her room, I just spent the last hour surfing the internet, playing words with friends, texting real friends and writing this post. Newsflash: the family room is still a mess.
I feel like I need to explain and justifies my deceit but this is supposed to be a simple post. So I’m not going to. I’m going to go to bed.*
*please note, the family room is still not cleaned up.